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  1. #1
    Join Date
    May 2002
    Location
    Across the pond
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    24,313

    how do you know if you've made the right decision?

    if you stay with a person, or if you leave a person, how do you know if its the right decision?

    say your with a guy and your happy alot, but there are alot of things that are shit and its just hard and you re-think you choice of being with him everyday, then you leave him. but things only get worse, you feel more like shit than ever before? how do you know what to do?
    Of all the mistakes you've made, the best are yet to come.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Nov 2002
    Location
    Cambridge
    Posts
    2,359
    Depends if you've already talked through and tried to solve your problems or not. The 'shit things' can either be problems that you can sort out with your boyfriend, or signs that your relationship isn't meant to be.

    That's a really difficult question you're asking though!!! I think only you can know whether it's worth carrying on your relationship...
    Whenever I get the urge to work I go and lie down... and the urge goes away.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Aug 2002
    Location
    South Coast
    Posts
    6,406
    I dont think you know whether you made the right decision til a bit further down the line. If you break up with someone sometimes you dont realise it was the right decision until you meet someone better, then you realise that what you did was right.
    I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Nov 2002
    Location
    Canada
    Posts
    93
    things have a way of working out. you'll know what to do and when. best of luck.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Aug 2002
    Location
    ooop north
    Posts
    12,718
    Whenever you break up with someone things always feel shiter for a small while as you get over them.

    This is why so many people go back to their partners even when it's not right. The only way you can really know is by leaving it a suitable amount of time before you make any decision.

    I find it's a good idea to not talk to the person I'm breaking up with during that time, too, because otherwise they will simply persuade you to get back with them, whilst you're most vunerable and unable to think clearly.

    If after a week, or a day, or however much time you need without talking to them and just thinking it over, you decide you should go back to them and give it another shot, then do that, otherwise you will have properly broken up and, since you would have not been talking, you should have some degree of detachment already.

    It's bound not to be easy and it's bound to feel like shit either way, the important thing is that you make the right decision in the end that is absolutely right for *you* and not anyone else.
    Another quality post brought to you by Mr Mist, god of Moo.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Aug 2002
    Location
    Planet perfecto
    Posts
    1,321
    I have a distinct feeling of knowing whether something is good or bad, but love can alter your decision. I knew that my ex didn't get on with my son but I tried to block it out, hoping it would change. When he ended our relationship I was gutted but more because I was rejected. I now know we weren't right even though I still love him.
    'If you don't know where you're going, you will end up somewhere else'..

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Sep 2002
    Posts
    2,474
    They say you dont miss something until its gone-

    You can tell this properly maybe 2-3 weeks after a break-up normally if It was the right decision.
    With my last gf I finished with her- felt bad afterwards but was happy that I done it for certain reasons. I think you just kinda know!
    If you cant be good, be good at it
    No wonder santa is so jolly, he knows where all the naughty girls live! :P

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Dec 2002
    Location
    Sure you can find me in my local :)
    Posts
    250
    You dont, You just have to make a decesion (sp) and stick to it. Its easyier said than done. do a for and against list, and see how that works. But if your rethinking your choice everyday then something definatly isnt right. I spent 2 yrs with someone, and i felt exactly the same as you, but the other thing was i didnt want to be on my own, now im the extremely happy to have my own life back.
    I am a

    Life is like a box of chocolates - You never know whatcha gonna get - Forest Gump 9/1996

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