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Exam stress, Rape and baby loss

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  • Exam stress, Rape and baby loss

    I'm really not coping at the moment and now I'm sitting my GCSEs and I'm just ready to give up on everything. I just want everything to go away. I want to go back to last year before any of this ever happened or just disappear. I'm not eating much anymore or sleeping for that matter. I'm constantly on edge and can't even leave the house on my own.

    I was raped last year by a stranger who has never been found. I've done all the police procedures and meetings and all that crap and got no where! I'm reciving counselling but again I don't feel any benefit from it prehaps I'm just to damaged to be undone.

    I fell pregnant due to the rape and while I found it hard to cope with the pregnancy and first I bonded with my baby. But I've been pressured to give her away despite the fact I didn't want to and my mum basically tore her from me. I know she was concived by rape but she was still mine! I only had one day with her and I haven't seen her since.

    This is all I can think about and I need to do well in my GCSEs to get into college but how can I??

    I feel like I have no one to talk to anymore. My mum just acts as if this never happened and gets annoyed if I try to mention it. I'm just a worthless teenager who's just had enough of everything.
    Last edited by Jenner; 08-05-2017, 09:34 PM.

  • #2
    Hiya,

    Oh, I'm so so sorry to read that you've been going through all this. You've taken a big step in reaching out on here so well done for posting this up. I don't have much advice to offer you on this but I just wanted to say you're not a worthless teenager, you are valued and you do matter!
    Sending you hugs x!
    "Truely independent person who doesn't do quotes, just dates".. (29.04.17)

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    • #3
      Hi Independent to be honest that's the best thing I've heard for a while. It feels as if everyone has just given up on me and something so simple as what you have said has made me feel that someone does care.

      I've tried telling my mum about how much I wanted to keep my baby despite everything but she said I was being cruel and now it's too late and it's more than likely I'll never see her again.

      Thank you for you kind words it was and is something I needed to hear. I'm here for you too if you need me X

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      • #4
        Originally posted by Jenner View Post
        Hi Independent to be honest that's the best thing I've heard for a while. It feels as if everyone has just given up on me and something so simple as what you have said has made me feel that someone does care.

        I've tried telling my mum about how much I wanted to keep my baby despite everything but she said I was being cruel and now it's too late and it's more than likely I'll never see her again.

        Thank you for you kind words it was and is something I needed to hear. I'm here for you too if you need me X
        Ah, I'm so so glad to hear that. People do care. People want to help you. You are not alone!
        "Truely independent person who doesn't do quotes, just dates".. (29.04.17)

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        • #5
          Thanks I've just replied to my other thred about my baby Elle and I'm going to try again and get through to my mum that I need to see her.

          I'm really nervous about my exams now and I haven't got a clue about what to do :/ think I'm going try and get some help at school.

          After posting on here I'm feeling a little bit better than I was now that someone has listened to me.

          Thank you once again It means so much Xx

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          • #6
            I'm really sorry you have been through this. Nothing anyone should have to go through. And makes you far from worthless and strong to post here about it. Taking things slowly while you feel like this could help and not try to pus things to much like school if it makes you feel worse. And i hope you seek the help from school so your not coping all on your own. Especially if its making you not eat and want to give up
            And I think its understandable you found some connect with your baby.

            You're not to damaged and there are people who care and want to see you doing well

            Take care of yourself
            "Nothing's ever what we expect, but they keep asking where we're going next" Robin Schulz - Sun goes down

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            • #7
              Thanks guys, I'm really dreading my exams right now. I spoke to someone at school about what's going on and I actually ended up telling them everything which kinda felt good after. They are going to arrange a meeting with me and my mum to discuss how they can help.

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              • #8
                Well done for telling the school!! I'm glad that they seem to be doing loads to help you already by having the meeting with you and your mum. You're not alone in dreading exams - I am too.

                Please do take care of yourself make sure to take time out to relax too!
                "Truely independent person who doesn't do quotes, just dates".. (29.04.17)

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                • #9
                  Thanks again Independent, I've had the meeting with school and will be given extra support with revision they are going to look into getting me extra time too but don't know if I'll get it.

                  Mum has finally started talking about my daughter with me. And Via a website thanks to Aife I'm being supported on the side of loosing my child and I'm now also looking into getting access to my daughter it is all looking up for me at the moment.

                  Not sure why mum has had a change of heart but it may or may not have something to do with the meeting at school as she actually finally listened to me properly.

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                  • #10
                    Oh I'm so glad your meeting went well and that things are looking up for you 😊😊😊😊
                    "Truely independent person who doesn't do quotes, just dates".. (29.04.17)

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                    • #11
                      Hey Jenner,

                      That's so great your meeting went well with the school and that they're going to give you extra support. I'm so glad you found the website I linked you to helpful and that you're being supported on there. It can be really hard reaching out for support so you should be so proud of yourself for being so strong .

                      Keep us updated with how things are going and feel free to post her whenever you like, we're all here for you

                      - Aife

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