I wake up every morning and wish and wonder why I'm not dead ,i can sleep for ages but still wake up exhausted , i carnt be open with anyone because i feel like they don't care and when they say they do they really don't that's why i keep it to myself. I've started drinking soo much recently and it should bother me but it doesn't it just helps numb the pain. I see everyone one moving on with there life's and I'm stuck here standing still and it hurts what do i need to do to make it stop.
I feel so alone. unwanted used . Messed up , unworthy , dead inside , crushed , drowning , hurt ,lost and beyond help . I close my eyes and i can see him raping me over and over again how is that fair i can feel him , hear him , smell him its touture and I'm done with it , i wish i kept quiet about it because it would be easier to let it carry on than deal with this now
If i could leave this world with no questions asked i would but i guess I'll just keep it to myself from now on 😭😭😭😭