Perfect Relationships

[RepeatToFade]

Do you feel your relationship is perfect? Do you wish it could be better?

Im asking because last night, me and my boyfriend of four and a half years split up. We have quite a few arguments, and i get pretty defensive, as I hate for him to be annoyed at me. We both love each other (well i love him so much) and I want it to work, but i want it to be better for both of us. I keep wondering whether theres something better out there for both of us. But am i just hoping for a completely perfect relationship? Am i looking for too much out of it? I know people argue in relationships, and that its pretty healthy, but i dont know whether i should be having these doubts. I just dont know whether to try and get back together with him, or to leave it completely?

[otter]

there is no such thing as a perfect relationship!!!!!

[RepeatToFade]

yeah i know theres not. Im sorry im not explaining myself well.

I suppose i want to know how you know that theres not something better out there and that the disagreements are just normal within relationships.

I just dont know what to do, as i really do love him.

[otter]

there will always be something better out there.
the question is whether you find it or not.
whether you are happy with what you've got already.

did you break up with your bf then on the off-chance that something better might have been coming your way or because you were dissatisfied with your relationship for some other reason?

[Guest_]

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[lucifer devil]

nothing's perfect, and relationships certainly aren't. i think i'd get bored if they were! but at the same time, you just have to ask yourself whether you're truely happy when you're with him.

[Scarlet]

nothing's perfect, and relationships certainly aren't. i think i'd get bored if they were!
I agree.

There's nothing like a good argument :p

[satehen]

I think if your allready thinking it wasn't good enough, its best that you find someone else. But be warned of the grass is always greener syndrome!
My relationship isn't perfect, but i wouldn't give him up for the world!

[NothingGoldCanStay]

I dont think any relationship is perfect. Ive recently started up a new relationship, and it is going really well. We havent had any fights.. yet. I know theres bound to be some fights, but hopefully we'll be able to work through it. You all automatically assume the perfect relationship means that you never fight. I dont see it that way. Fights are necessary in a relationship. So. If i could tell you what I wanted from this relationship, it would be a lot of fun, but also the occasional fight, but only if we always make up at the end :) . Fights are part of a relationship... and i think that the "perfect" relationship has to have fights involved.

[Kermit]

If you are wondering about greener grass then the relationship already has problems. Either you can work at your relationship and sort it out, or you can end it, and I would suspect that, honestly, you already know which option you want to take and just want someone else to endorse your decision.

If you want to work at it then work at it, if you can't really be arsed anymore then I would suggest ending it.

Relationships have their ups and downs, and if a couple aren't disgareeing then they're not trying hard enough. I couldn't explain why I don't think that I could better my wife, it's just a truth I hold, and in reality its not something you can learn to do.

[loveablesilence]

Nothing's perfect but if you're with the right person you don't even stop to consider whether someone else out there would be better.

[Olive]

everyone argues, but the measure of a relationship is how you deal with your disagreements.

everyone knows a couple who they think has a perfect relationship, but it's bollocks. in fact, they're the most likely to break up cause they have their heads in the sand about each other's faults.

god knows i'm not the perfect woman. and my other half is not the perfect man. i know that and he knows that. but he is the right man for me. you have to decide for yourself the difference.

[mattmoo]

yes i think i agree with kafrin i prefer the couples that are open about their good and bad points why do people try and put up this, we are perfect for each other, front when everyone knows thats not reality.
Id rather have some arguements and know my other half properly then pretend i know them fully and have no arguements.

[frenchflower]

I also think arguments are part of a relationship. It's not a test but you do get to know each other better in some ways and two people can't always want exactly the same things, so it is only right to have the occasional snap. 2 months ago, I split up with my boyfriend of 4.5 years and he made it clear yesterday again that it was because we were starting to argue too much over the last 6 months (due to difficult circumstances). Whereas I thought we were trying to go through it and make it work, he actually started drifting apart slowly. So what you need to know, is that you both want the same thing... hard to establish, I know, when it's all emotional! The only thing is, when you do have those arguments, you need to know when it is too much... Emotional blackmail, violence, verbal and physical abuse are never right... So if they do occur too often, you need to look after yourself first. After spending so much time with him though, it is probably hard and scary to be away from him but maybe it will help you realise what you really want - to be with him or not. He will go through the same process himself. Hope it works out for you either way.
Take care xx

[Blairx0]

I don't know if there is such a thing as a perfect relationship. My boyfriend and I have minor problems but not which each other just b/c of circumstance. Tho to me it we are perfect: perfect together and perfect for each other. To others who don't understand they don't realize the meaning or significane of what we do and our lil jokes we are far from perfect. But we will always be perfect to me

[sexpod]

I think they are such things as a perfect relationship, if you two communicate really well than most likely things will work out considering you are fully understandable of each other's situation. The only thing "not perfect" in my relationship is distance, as in being far away but that problem will be resolved in a few weeks. So, I am rather self-complacent and happy go lucky. I guess it boils down to the love you have for each other and the legitimacy of it.