Ouch......

[melodie]

I got really annoyed yesterday with some issues, stormed out of bfs house and went and kicked a bloomin wall, the bloody thing bit me lol!!!! Anyway, I had to go to hospital and they put a support on it but it still hurts. Painkillers won't touch it, elevating it and putting 'ice' on it has not worked! They said they thing I damaged the ligaments but I dunno..... It hurts that much, it woke me up and it's making me cry :crying: and that is not good as I have a high pain threshold!!
Also, I cant even walk! My bf has to carry me everywhere.... which I don't like because i'm independant and like doing things myself.

[Kentish]

Boo hoo.

Independent doesn't have an a in it.

[spellboundSH]

Somebodys got a temper....

[melodie]

Boo hoo.

Independent doesn't have an a in it.

Very sorry, I had only just woke up, I was extremely tired...... I will google all my mistakes from now on oh, and go and study english :D :rolleyes:

All I was wondering was if anyone knew what may be wrong or anything that may help to ease the pain.

[Kentish]

What's wrong is that you kicked a wall. What can be done about it is to stop kicking walls. OK?

[melodie]

What's wrong is that you kicked a wall. What can be done about it is to stop kicking walls. OK?

I know that, but my bf hurt me. He hit me and lied to me. I was angry and hurt and took it out a wall!!

[Kentish]

If your boyfriend is hitting you, I suggest you do something about it. Domestic violence (http://www.bbc.co.uk/crime/support/domesticviolence.shtml).

An ice pack, elevation and a couple of paracetamols should help your foot. Try to keep your weight off it as much as possible.

[melodie]

If your boyfriend is hitting you, I suggest you do something about it. Domestic violence (http://www.bbc.co.uk/crime/support/domesticviolence.shtml).

An ice pack, elevation and a couple of paracetamols should help your foot. Try to keep your weight off it as much as possible.

Thank you.... He didn't mean to do it. It doesn't happen often, he has got a few problems. But thank you xxx

[Kentish]

Fine, but you don't have to put up with it. If he has problems, encourage him to seek help rather than take it out on you. Don't suffer in silence, especially if you have young children around.

[melodie]

there isn't children around otherwise I would have been gone. It is controled at the moment. He is going to counselling. I have warned him, if things don't improve, I will end the relationship. I'm just giving him a chance to prove to me he can get the help and change. If not..... then it will be over.

[nicebutdim23]

i hope he does for your sake hun, you seem to have had enough shit men in your life.

[melodie]

I know. I guess because i've had it all my life I just don't know anything different. I just want to be loved and he gives me that, I love him to and it's something I havn't really had.

[Lu_C]

If over the counter pain killers arn't touching the pain of your foot maybe you should go to the doc and ask for something stronger.

Did you have an x-ray? If not maybe the doc will want to send you for one as you can't walk etc...

And be wary of wanting your boyfriend to change, there is a chance with help that he can do, and if he is getting counselling then that is good, but you have to protect yourself even if you love this guy. Sometimes people can't change, even if he has troubles he shouldn't be taking them out on you and you shouldn't be having to put up with it no matter how understanding you are of why he does it. Especially if this has happened in the past with someone else, don't get yourself into a pattern of abusive relationships, no one diserves that. And it can't be making him feel good about himself when he flips out and hurts you, being together might be doing you both more harm than good.

[morrocan roll]

hang on ...your boyfriend hits you so you kick a wall.
to stop him behaving like this toward you ...you should have kicked him ...in the nuts.
then he could have made a post ...

'my nuts are killing me ...the size of a bleeding melon ...what can i do'?

and we could have answered ...'stop being a bullying bastard ...'.

[nicebutdim23]

hang on ...your boyfriend hits you so you kick a wall.
to stop him behaving like this toward you ...you should have kicked him ...in the nuts.
then he could have made a post ...

'my nuts are killing me ...the size of a bleeding melon ...what can i do'?

and we could have answered ...'stop being a bullying bastard ...'.

pmsl :lol: sorry!

[SuzyCreamcheese]

did they actually Xray you at all?
youve probably broken your toes so youll need to get it seen properly.

[BumbleBee]

I'm sure I read a topic yesterday or the day before that stated you'd split up? Anyway, I'm surprised you weren't given a short supply of a stronger pain killer at the hospital. Perhaps you could find a local NHS walk in centre and pop along there. Most A&E departments also advise you to go back if you have any further problems. They'll have all your case notes etc and it may just be a simple case of seeing the triage nurse for some painkillers.

[melodie]

They said they didn't want to xray it because it was unlikely that it was broken!! They said though to go back in 48hrs if it gets worse, it has so I will definately be going back 2moro....... this morning I had to crawl around to get what I want!! And painkillers really don't work so i'm really worried! It's swollen and I can't sleep because of the pain!!!

[BumbleBee]

They said they didn't want to xray it because it was unlikely that it was broken!! They said though to go back in 48hrs if it gets worse, it has so I will definately be going back 2moro....... this morning I had to crawl around to get what I want!! And painkillers really don't work so i'm really worried! It's swollen and I can't sleep because of the pain!!!

Why don't you go now then? Why can't people take responsibility for their own health? Far from asking advice on an internet message board you really should be down there now! It seems that you've already been given the correct advice (re-attend A&E if the pain continues). As for the painkiller situation, if you are in such severe pain the hospital will probably give you a short course of a more powerful painkiller than you've been taking, something that isn't available over the counter.

[melodie]

Why don't you go now then? Why can't people take responsibility for their own health? Far from asking advice on an internet message board you really should be down there now! It seems that you've already been given the correct advice (re-attend A&E if the pain continues). As for the painkiller situation, if you are in such severe pain the hospital will probably give you a short course of a more powerful painkiller than you've been taking, something that isn't available over the counter.

I am 4 miles away from the hospital..... there are no buses and no-one has a car!! :(

[satehen]

Melodie you deserve so much better than that! Why is it a man hits a woman and the first thing she says is he didn't mean to do it!? Of course he did because he's a bully! No woman should ever have to put up with domestic violence!! This time it may be a small bruise, but what if next time your in hospital? Or the time after your dead?! Leave now!! Once is once too much!

[melodie]

:( I love him and his family!!! I don't think that would happen!! i'm scared now!! :(

[satehen]

:( I love him and his family!!! I don't think that would happen!! i'm scared now!! :(

Mel i was stuck in a mentally abusive relationship for years, it wears down your self esteem, makes you feel worthless, like you can't do better or don't deserve to. Love does not come at a price of blood and bruises! This relationship is damaging you physically, emotionally and mentally. If your best friend came up to you and said she was in an abusive relationship, what would you say to her? I guarantee it won't be stand by him, i'm sure he doesnt mean it! You say your independent? Then why do you need him?! Be independent! Your a lovely girl and there are so many caring guys out there that would never dream of abusing you!

[morrocan roll]

i'm begining to think each thread is a wind up mel.

[melodie]

Mel i was stuck in a mentally abusive relationship for years, it wears down your self esteem, makes you feel worthless, like you can't do better or don't deserve to. Love does not come at a price of blood and bruises! This relationship is damaging you physically, emotionally and mentally. If your best friend came up to you and said she was in an abusive relationship, what would you say to her? I guarantee it won't be stand by him, i'm sure he doesnt mean it! You say your independent? Then why do you need him?! Be independent! Your a lovely girl and there are so many caring guys out there that would never dream of abusing you!

Thank you......... it is hard though. And yes if a friend was in my situation, I would be saying 'get the f**k out off it, your worth more than that'......

[malteser monkay]

i'm begining to think each thread is a wind up mel.

:yes:
I've just come off a thread where she's said about her child being placed into adoption which is an incredibly sad thing but without meaning to sound harsh and apologies for going off topic but if you're entering into another abusive relationship, why would your child be safer in this one than the last. When you first came you had been with someone an incredibly short time and wanted to have a baby with them then and there, 2 weeks on, you'd changed your mind. You've said your in a new loving relationship, detest drugs yet take them yourself...you seem to contradict yourself in every progressive thread. Your irrelevant comments made also in self-harming and depression threads to chuck something else in...if you want to be taken seriously here, you're gonna have to get your story straight and play in a bit more seriousness now and again and calm down with your !!! because they're making you seem very excited..and not genuine at all

i.e.
I love him and his family!!! I don't think that would happen!! i'm scared now!!

Does it not click with you that an abusive person...is something to be afraid of from the beginning? That being hit and abused by someone is terribly wrong, and you deserve more respect as an individual. You need to build up your own self-respect and self-asteem..cause allowing yourself to be pushed around and trying to kid yourself that your independent and self-assured, then trying to defend someone hurting you..is not the sign of that sorta person at all.

Sorry to sound harsh. You seem sweet enough but, be careful what you post. Be accurate, be sure of what your trying to say or you're gonna seem immature and contradictory and you won't be taken seriously here.

Malt xxx

[littlemissy]

Malt xxx

Everything you have said is exactly what I had been thinking. I am glad I am not the only person who thinks this.

And I wouldn't have been half as nice with the wording either ;)

I hope to God we are wrong and you are just unlucky because these are all horrible things to lie about and I dread to think about what sort of mind would think up lies like the one's we have read ...

I don't know. Something just isn't quite right here. Maybe I am just too cynical.

[morrocan roll]

ouch!

[melodie]

i'm begining to think each thread is a wind up mel.

They are certainly not wind ups. I am not that kind of person.

When you first came you had been with someone an incredibly short time and wanted to have a baby with them

We have been together 7 months. I miss being a mum

You've said your in a new loving relationship, detest drugs yet take them yourself...you seem to contradict yourself in every progressive thread.


It is loving, there has only been a couple of times that he has hit me and it was my fault. Yes, I detested drugs, but someone suggested cannabis to help me relax, it worked! So my mind changed but I do not agree with any other sort.

I hope to God we are wrong and you are just unlucky because these are all horrible things to lie about and I dread to think about what sort of mind would think up lies like the one's we have read ...


I would never ever lie. These things have and are happening and I have to live with it everyday. I am not some kind of sick person who wishes to seek attention. All I want is to come to terms with whats happened and let you know what I have experienced. I would never lie.

[morrocan roll]

didn't you also say you were leaving here the other day?

sorry mel but there is absolutely no consistency to your posts.
people get suspicious.

[malteser monkay]

Everything you have said is exactly what I had been thinking. I am glad I am not the only person who thinks this.

And I wouldn't have been half as nice with the wording either ;)

I hope to God we are wrong and you are just unlucky because these are all horrible things to lie about and I dread to think about what sort of mind would think up lies like the one's we have read ...

I don't know. Something just isn't quite right here. Maybe I am just too cynical.

*pheeew* see I was expecting someone to go OMG HOW YOU COULD BE SO CRUEL YOU NASTY BITCH!...if they are lies, they're horrendous. I want to believe in a sense that they are true because then all these people who have contributed with the ways in which they have suffered with abuse, with losing a child through the means that Miffy has illustrated in another post, troubled relationships - a lot of people have beared all in these incredibly sensitive subjects, and I hope they're not being taken for fools but someone weaving lies.

Otherwise, if they are true, then she is a very unlucky and seemingly incredibly naive young lady, and I feel very very sorry for her.

Malt xxx

[morrocan roll]

They are certainly not wind ups. I am not that kind of person.



We have been together 7 months. I miss being a mum




It is loving, there has only been a couple of times that he has hit me and it was my fault. Yes, I detested drugs, but someone suggested cannabis to help me relax, it worked! So my mind changed but I do not agree with any other sort.




I would never ever lie. These things have and are happening and I have to live with it everyday. I am not some kind of sick person who wishes to seek attention. All I want is to come to terms with whats happened and let you know what I have experienced. I would never lie.
ouch.

[melodie]

didn't you also say you were leaving here the other day?

sorry mel but there is absolutely no consistency to your posts.
people get suspicious.

Yes, me and my bf split, but then we worked things out and I liked being on here because I could talk about my issues. My head is just completely messed up right now!! I'm all over the place with all that has happened, my anti d's are making me feel and act odd! I don't like it at all. I'm sorry.

[melodie]

*pheeew* see I was expecting someone to go OMG HOW YOU COULD BE SO CRUEL YOU NASTY BITCH!...if they are lies, they're horrendous. I want to believe in a sense that they are true because then all these people who have contributed with the ways in which they have suffered with abuse, with losing a child through the means that Miffy has illustrated in another post, troubled relationships - a lot of people have beared all in these incredibly sensitive subjects, and I hope they're not being taken for fools but someone weaving lies.

Otherwise, if they are true, then she is a very unlucky and seemingly incredibly naive young lady, and I feel very very sorry for her.

Malt xxx

Do you not think that it was hard for me to explain about this. I have been judged in bad ways and some people have not listened to me. I hurt everyday and wanted you to know what I had been through, a) for guideance b) to show you that I have been through issues so when I reply to a post or thread, you understand that i'm replying with the experience I have had. I do not speak to my family, my friends still wish to be friendly with my ex (gareth) so I can't trust them. I am scared to be on my own and I have no confidence and can be quite naive.

[Mushy24]

I know that, but my bf hurt me. He hit me and lied to me. I was angry and hurt and took it out a wall!!

I'm just going to say - Don't ever stick up for a boyfriend that hits you! There are real men out there who don't hit women! Been there, done that - you need to move on.... they don't change! By the way - sorry about your foot, sounds like you are gonna have to tuff it out. Try soaking it in the tub.

[morrocan roll]

my anti d's are making me feel and act odd! .

so you ARE taking them then ...

[melodie]

I am slowly getting myself off them!! I don't want to stop them 'just like that' because I did once and I became really ill from the withdrawal syptoms. I just feel scared and lonely and like I have nothing to live for. I am not lying, I would never do that?

[littlemissy]

so you ARE taking them then ...

I am very confused also.

There is so much that simply doesn't add up, and so much backtracking has been done in order to cover backs or one story and another. I don't get it.

As I said before, something just isn't quite kosher IMHO.

[morrocan roll]

I am slowly getting myself off them!! I don't want to stop them 'just like that' because I did once and I became really ill from the withdrawal syptoms. I just feel scared and lonely and like I have nothing to live for. I am not lying, I would never do that?
mel ...your just confusing me ...and others apparently.
the other day you said you were using dope INSTEAD of anti d's ...
see whay i mean about confusing?

[malteser monkay]

Do you not think that it was hard for me to explain about this. I have been judged in bad ways and some people have not listened to me. I hurt everyday and wanted you to know what I had been through, a) for guideance b) to show you that I have been through issues so when I reply to a post or thread, you understand that i'm replying with the experience I have had. I do not speak to my family, my friends still wish to be friendly with my ex (gareth) so I can't trust them. I am scared to be on my own and I have no confidence and can be quite naive.

Then this is what we need to know. Honey don't think I'm getting at you at all. You are completely and utterly welcome here. People will always try and help you, guide you and we want you to post and tell us things about your life, contribute to what others have to say. But you have to understand our persective - we do not know you, we do not know every aspect of your life, we're not expecting you to drip feed us a little about yourself every couple of weeks - you've come here and you've posted up in all the relevant forums about what is going on in your life, people have commented, hopefully these comments have benefited your situation, your frame of mind or the way you look at something. But anyone like me, and this applies to loads of members, who post and reply in numerous forums across the board are seeing really relevant differences in your telling of your situation - really big contradictions that make us wonder 'well what is true? ...whats said in this thread...or in the last one I read...' for example with the child thread - your child was put into adoption, your away from the abusive partner, everyone said "notify your solicitor, you have rights to your child'...then more started unravelling that made more sense as to why you couldn't have your child back. You said you were in a loving relationship in that post. Now you say in this post, your current partner hits you, which further illustrates why your child is going up for adoption - this not being mentioned in the previous post where it is incredibly relevant and would have cleared up misunderstandings.

We don't want you to feel like you're not being taken seriously, but you have to see that some things you say don't add up because some details that are really relevant are missed out and placed elsewhere where they don't as such relate to the current thread - it's confusing!

Malt xxx

[melodie]

mel ...your just confusing me ...and others apparently.
the other day you said you were using dope INSTEAD of anti d's ...
see whay i mean about confusing?

Now i'm confusing myself... I am but I need to gradually come off the anti'ds... I wish I didn't even bother confiding in people about my issues. It hurts enough all fucking ready. All I wanted was to do was be able to discuss things so I can come to terms with them, and this is what I fucking get. What is the point. People that know me know i'm not a liar, it's just unfortunate I do not have someone to back me up!
I mean, I still have reports about what happened with my son, the fact that I took my ex to court and am currently taking him to court for harrassment! Do you want me to fax it all to you? I feel suicidal as it is, I needed support not crap!

[littlemissy]

Now i'm confusing myself... I am but I need to gradually come off the anti'ds... I wish I didn't even bother confiding in people about my issues. It hurts enough all fucking ready. All I wanted was to do was be able to discuss things so I can come to terms with them, and this is what I fucking get. What is the point. People that know me know i'm not a liar, it's just unfortunate I do not have someone to back me up!
I mean, I still have reports about what happened with my son, the fact that I took my ex to court and am currently taking him to court for harrassment! Do you want me to fax it all to you? I feel suicidal as it is, I needed support not crap!

Try and see it from our perspectives though. Here we are, being told one thing one day and another the next and we start to get suspicious. You would too. It is natural, really.

We have had so many people come on here and feed us cock and bull stories about one thing and another that people are naturally suspicious. If things don't make sense to people, then they thing something ain't right. And that is exactly what we are saying. If the shoe was on the other foot then you would say the same thing.

Ya see what I mean here? If you read over all your old posts you will see that you are contradicting yourself a lot. It certainly looks like a make belief story from our side.

However, if these things are all happening to you, then I hope you can resolve them. No-one deserves all the shit you seem to have had in your short life.

[melodie]

I wrote a little bit about it at first because I find it hard to talk about, i'm sorry for that, I thought if I made it really long, no-one would want to read it! I can see where you are all coming from on the fact that I have contradicted myself but my opinions change all the time. When I feel strong, I talk sense, when I am extremely depressed I confuse myself and others because I can't get what I want to say out correctly. I also have barely slept this week which adds to it. I am having a really bad time at the moment and my head is completely scrambled. But I can see where your coming from. I was also scared of telling people about my situation because I thought people were going to be awful to me about it!

[malteser monkay]

I wrote a little bit about it at first because I find it hard to talk about, i'm sorry for that, I thought if I made it really long, no-one would want to read it! I can see where you are all coming from on the fact that I have contradicted myself but my opinions change all the time. When I feel strong, I talk sense, when I am extremely depressed I confuse myself and others because I can't get what I want to say out correctly. I also have barely slept this week which adds to it. I am having a really bad time at the moment and my head is completely scrambled. But I can see where your coming from. I was also scared of telling people about my situation because I thought people were going to be awful to me about it!

I can understand, even relate. One of my first posts was a completely bear all one - I let it all out and I really really pretty much begged for help. I told all. And openness, illustrated sincerity and people gave me looooads of help. They brought up their experiences, I told them all. And here you need to. It can be intimidating but at the same time - we don't know you. We're not like the other people in your life. We're blank - you feed us the info, we give you what we know. The ones that have stuck around here are here because they can help,they have something to say. They'd have buggered off or been blocked a looong time ago if they were accomodating or willing to reply and be helpful and do their bit.

Malt xx

[Mist]

Opinions change, facts do not.

People get confused and suspicious if folk say one thing one minute and a completely different thing the next. For example, the other day you made a post saying you wouldn't be around here any more as you had no computer, but if anything you've been on here even more often since then.

This sort of thing doesn't help to make people like and trust in what you are saying really. If you've come here for advice then people need to know what the real story is.

[melodie]

I was in an hysterical state when I wrote that. I had packed my bags, he was crying, I was... I was leaving him, went to the shop to get some credit, on the way stupidly kicked a wall and he took me to the hospital because I was angry that he could hit me e.t.c... we talked and I just couldn't leave him... so I landed up back at his!!

[Mist]

I was in an hysterical state when I wrote that. I had packed my bags, he was crying, I was... I was leaving him, went to the shop to get some credit, on the way stupidly kicked a wall and he took me to the hospital because I was angry that he could hit me e.t.c... we talked and I just couldn't leave him... so I landed up back at his!!


See I find it hard to believe that a desperate person who wanted to leave an abusive man would take time out to pop to the shop and get credit for their phone on the way, when that is the sort of thing that could easily be done in safety miles away.

However, on the vague chance that that is true, you would still be better off leaving this bloke, because people with violent tendencies like that don't just change overnight.

[melodie]

See I find it hard to believe that a desperate person who wanted to leave an abusive man would take time out to pop to the shop and get credit for their phone on the way, when that is the sort of thing that could easily be done in safety miles away.

However, on the vague chance that that is true, you would still be better off leaving this bloke, because people with violent tendencies like that don't just change overnight.

I was in a village, 4 miles away from a town. I needed credit to phone my friend hannah to pick me up if she could. I had been staying with my bf for the past few months because of my depression e.t.c so I had alot of things there!

[Mist]

Well it's your choice as to staying or not. You have to decide how much your things are worth and wether they are worth more than you. *shrug*

[nicebutdim23]

It is loving, there has only been a couple of times that he has hit me and it was my fault.

there is never an excuse for violence. a man not having enough self-control to not resort to violence is his fault ,not yours...even if you had been winding him up . there is no excuse

[JsT]

Sadly all she has written above is true.

And she's left him anyway now.

[nicebutdim23]

good for her

[satehen]

It is loving, there has only been a couple of times that he has hit me and it was my fault.


It is NEVER your fault!

[satehen]

Sadly all she has written above is true.

And she's left him anyway now.

I hope thats true!

[melodie]

Well, my foot's nearly better... Still bloomin hurts and i'm still limping but hey... It was self inflicted it'll teach me not to do it again!