How to be less possesive?

[JJ454]

Hey,

Well I'm not going to go into the whole saga, but me and my g/f of 2 years split up about 3 months ago, and kinda started seeing each other again recently, but although we've both agreed that we don't want to go straight into anything, we want to be sure its the right thing to do and that we won't just get back together for the sake of it and then split up 2 weeks down the line.

But I'm finding myself getting really wound up about not seeing her, its great when I do see her, but like yesterday, she went shopping with a friend, said she'd be home by 3, and didn't get back till 6, so I was in a right strop! Now I know its probably childish, but I can't help it!

And today, I went to london and she said ring me when you get back, so I did, and she was out with her friend, fair play, that doesn't bother me, then she says I'll speak to you later! So now I'm sat here like a lemon, waiting on a phone call (none of my mates want to go out, tried to get out the house already to take my mind off it) which I know I'll get about 11pm to say ninight. And now I'm getting wound up again because she's off doing something with her mates and not me!

Now I know possesiveness is a horrible trait, and I've been on the recieving end of it with her before and hated it, but now the tables have turned and I really don't want to be feeling like this! Because if I see her then I just end up being in a strop and it just ends up messing things up even more!

:confused: :blush: :( Thanks

[otter]

firstly - you need to realize that you are both individuals and you are both entitled to your own lives aside from your relationship together.

you say that the "tables were turned" once before,- so how did it make you feel at the time, having a really possessive partner???

if you really cannot help yourself, perhaps leaving off a relationship for a while and thinking about may be getting some counselling in the mean time, to help change your patterns of behaviour might be a good idea?!

[mystifymysoul]

If she has been possessive with you in the past, maybe she is trying to step away from that idea and now you are the one doing the chasing. Just accept the fact that you both have to do different things, but this shouldnt create a barrier between you. All relationships have obstacles..just try and get round them. The less time you spend together, the more important the time you do have together will be.