clueless

[freak]

iv only had sex once with my ex. me+the current bf are on the way to having sex soon+i wondered if there was anything i can do while underneath to make it better for him. +when i finally get some confdence to go on top..wtf do i actually do??i know this sounds really silly but i dont really know.i dont have easy access to porn or anything+i dont wana end up js sitting there going 'erm...'

[Kermit]

I could give you a whole load of suggestions, but it all depends on what the bf likes.

I personally like having my back scratched hard, I like having the lass pull me deeper inside her, and other good things you could try could include stroking his hair, kissing his neck and contracting your pelivic muscles around him as he's inside you.

But every man is different, and the only way you'll know is through trial and error.

But don't worry, you'll be so caught up in the passion of the moment that you won't just lie there motionless, you'll be clawing as his body, kissing it, stroking it and pulling him deeper inside you. Sex is the most instinctive thing you can do, so don't fret about your "performance" and just enjoy it, because it's wonderful:)

[go_away]

I doubt porn will help much, the way it's filmed and the positions used are to maximise the camera shots of penetration etc.

With a new partner it's not always going to be fireworks the first couple of times around anyway, it can take a while to get used to each others body dynamics etc. so in that time you'll get a better idea of what works for you both :)

[freak]

im worried itl really hurt with him though. i get nervous(to the extent i couldnt take him just fingering me with one finger) +when i lost it it hurt+id already had 4 hours of foreplay.im worried il js lie there trying to distract myself from pain+hel get nothing out of it.

[go_away]

If you think you'll have to distract yourself from the pain, then you're setting yourself up for a not very enjoyable evening.

Maybe instead of having sex straight away you could explain your concerns to this guy (I'm sure that he cares about you, and wouldn't want you to be in pain at a time of great pleasure) and maybe you could experiment a bit without penetration first? That way, it may relax you more and sex will be more enjoyable for you? Lubricant can also help things along.

If you try then and are still experiencing pain, there may be an underlying reason for it? Painful sex (http://netdoctor.co.uk/sex_relationships/facts/painfulintercourse.htm)

[Kermit]

Take it very slowly, and remember that penetration is not the only form of sexual contact that has any pleasure in it.

Most "tightness" is purely psychological, and the vagina is incredibly stretchy.

[lucifer devil]

I know you'll still be nervous, but trust me - there's no need to worry. Like Kermit said, it'll come instinctively and you'll do what feels right for both of you. If you worry you'll only get yourself all worked up so try chill out, and enjoy yourself.