Advice needed.

[RachaelHolmes]

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[Martin_Bashir]

i cant really help as i dont know you're situation BUT

I can't cope with the stresses of being single again

sticking with someone to escape being single is a very dubious situation to put yourself in

[dizzzy]

(it was the weekend that I was supposed to be getting married).


what do you mean??

[RachaelHolmes]

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[RachaelHolmes]

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[dizzzy]

ooooh, sorry

[RachaelHolmes]

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[otter]

sticking with someone to escape being single is a very dubious situation to put yourself in

I think I would agree with that, although I don't know the ins and outs of your relationship; it sounds as though the relationship was fairly new before he went back to university. If that is the case maybe it would be best not to have any great expectations. I have spoken to him since and he says that he really likes me and wants to make a go of things with me but he doesn't want to stand in the way of me meeting somebody else who can be here for me.
- It sounds as though he's trying to look out for you, and is taking the time to think about your needs as well as his own. Long distance relationships are by their very nature, difficult to maintain and it really depends on the people involved; their personality and the strength of the realtionship before anyone went away.
One of the most important aspects of any relationship is communication between those involved - Have you tried talking to him and telling him how you are feeling and explaining your concerns? Have you thought/ talked about what you want out of this long-distant realtionship? Have you thought about what you are getting out of it, are your needs being met? Have you discussed monogamy or would you both be happy seeing other people?- whatever the case, the only way to avoid having to "guess what guys are thinking" - is to ask!

[RachaelHolmes]

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[otter]

Good relationships need trust, respect, and a mutual feeling of satisfaction amongst other things. If you are "getting nothing out of the relationship apart from a crappy feeling because he hasn't got time", then I think, you really need to consider if this relationship is something you want to hold onto?!

[RachaelHolmes]

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[dizzzy]

he can't spend all his time working though. . .. can he?

i have just started uni, and my partner comes down most weekends. I know i am lucky to see him that often but I think it would be really hard to make it work if we only saw each other during holidays

[byny]

Sorry hun but 7 weeks and 2 broken engagements (and i mean the two times you tried to hook up) seems to mean that he really isn't interested in having a complete relationship with you.

You said stuff happened - you mean sex?

Sounds to me like he might come back in his holidays and take the sex (or whatever) but not actually want to take you up on the offer of a relationship.

My advice would be to not hang around. He seems to be letting you down gently with the 'not wanting to stand in the way of other relationships' stuff.

If you are prepared to have fun but no ties then go for it but it sounds like he's not ready to do the relationship thing!