jealous girlfriend

[wee_laura]

I've been really close friends with a boy I know for about 5 years. We went out for a while about a year and a half ago but it ended and we jus went back to being best friends.

Recently he got a new girlfriend, she knew we were good friends before they got together but now she has put a stop to the friendship saying she doesnt like the relationship we have and that he doesnt need me now because she can help him with all the problems I helped him with before.

I'm so angry about it all because he is kinda going along with it, I understand he doesnt want to upset his girlfriend but its really getting to me.

Any ideas on what I could do to help the whole situation would be greatly appreciated.

[swank]

*blank*

[ShyBoy]

This happened to me. Twice. It's not necissarily that he doesn't like you, just when people get into a full relationship they give more of their time to that. I think you just need to accept that things aren't going to be like how they were before he went out with this girl. If she is telling him he isn't allowed to see you at all then it's up to him to stand up for himself and tell her no, because you're his friend and have been his best friend for 5 years, and some girl who's been here for 5 minutes aint got a hope in hell of changing that. And if she doesn't like it, she can go awaaaayyyyy.

[byny]

Just be mature and back off a little - you don't want to push him into a situation where he feels like he has to choose and if you do push him she will get even more jealous.
A relationship usually means that the two people involved mean a great deal more to eachother and in a different way to just a friendship and you have to accet that . Why would he want to be that close to someone but not share an intense bond?

he bond they have will possibly develop int a stronger one that you two ever had and your friendship will change as a result....He has every right to choose her 'over' you to be honest.

[wee_laura]

Originally posted by TheShyBoyInTheCorner
This happened to me. Twice. It's not necissarily that he doesn't like you, just when people get into a full relationship they give more of their time to that. I think you just need to accept that things aren't going to be like how they were before he went out with this girl. If she is telling him he isn't allowed to see you at all then it's up to him to stand up for himself and tell her no, because you're his friend and have been his best friend for 5 years, and some girl who's been here for 5 minutes aint got a hope in hell of changing that. And if she doesn't like it, she can go awaaaayyyyy.

He has apologised about the way he is being, just says that she is really upset over our relationship and he dont wanna hurt her and he hopes it aint a long term situation. I've also told him how much he is hurting me.

I understand where she is coming from becuase we do have a touchy feely relationdhip but I dont wanna change the way I act around my friend just for his girlfriend.

[ShyBoy]

Originally posted by wee_laura
He has apologised about the way he is being, just says that she is really upset over our relationship and he dont wanna hurt her and he hopes it aint a long term situation. I've also told him how much he is hurting me.

I understand where she is coming from becuase we do have a touchy feely relationdhip but I dont wanna change the way I act around my friend just for his girlfriend.

some people are incredibly jealous. my two best makle mates have recently got girlfriends and now i cant 'play thump' them anymore or anything (we're 16 yr old guys, we playfight :p) because they go on about it. Everyone is just acting too mature and we're still 16 and it's like they're all engaged and AHHHHHH :crying: I wan't my mates back!

[SuzyCreamcheese]

Originally posted by wee_laura

I understand where she is coming from becuase we do have a touchy feely relationdhip but I dont wanna change the way I act around my friend just for his girlfriend.
To be honest, I wouldnt be happy with my partner having a `touchy feely` relationship with a female friend either.
Im not saying theres more to it than just friendship, but being touchy feeley with someone is very flirty behaviour, and whether you actually want him like that or not, is beside the point. She feels threatened by it/you.
I had a friendship like that with an old male friend of mine. I knew he fancied me in a way, and I loved that, but it was never gonna go anywhere, but I was still flirty and touchy feeley with him. he got a new girlfriend - she hated me. I couldnt understand it at the time because I wasnt interested in him, therefore I wasnt a threat but he was interested in me and she knew it, whether he`d said anything or not!
In hindsight its completely obvious why she didnt like me, and he ended up playing us both off against each other.

[wee_laura]

Thanks for the help everyone!

We had a chat tonight and we've kinda sorted things out, just decided to cool the friendship when shes there which I guess is a valid comprimise. He promised its only a temporary measure until she gets used to our friendship.

Thanks again! :)

[VinylVicky]

Make friends with his girlf. While sh doesnt know you, she will make assumptions and beat her self over the person she thinks you are. Become her freind and gain her trust and you should be ok.

[ryoko_rock]

Originally posted by wee_laura
I've been really close friends with a boy I know for about 5 years. We went out for a while about a year and a half ago but it ended and we jus went back to being best friends.

Recently he got a new girlfriend, she knew we were good friends before they got together but now she has put a stop to the friendship saying she doesnt like the relationship we have and that he doesnt need me now because she can help him with all the problems I helped him with before.

I'm so angry about it all because he is kinda going along with it, I understand he doesnt want to upset his girlfriend but its really getting to me.

Any ideas on what I could do to help the whole situation would be greatly appreciated.

that's a bit harsh isn't it??!!

have u spoken to him alone about stuff, and told him that you still wanna be friends and everything? she's being wa too over the top, i mean obviously she has a right to be a bit jealous i guess cos ur his ex, but she can't stop u being friends!! what a freak!

[heartlessBYhim]

i always have been better friends with boys and have never accepted why girls cant accept that. but i understand now, i couldnt have my boyfriend be real pally with a lass. but you have been friends for 5 years and that is very special. i hope you work this out. if its any help am a jealous chick also. about anything. x

[*§atania*]

Ever considered that maybe your friends gf is feeling really insecure and worried about you and him. It's horrible to feel like that. You've had your chance, back off a little bit, it's obvious that you can't have the same relationship now that you had with him before. You don't have to disappear completely but distance yourself a little bit. It's time to move and leave the space for his gf.

My opinion anyway.