dealing with unrequited love

[spoonboy]

Well here goes, long story but i'll try and make it short.

Basically I've been good friends with a girl for several years now, and the problem is im completely and utterly crazy about her.

So why not try get together with her? Well firstly, she seems to be unsure whether she has a boyfriend, sometimes she does sometimes she doesnt (there seems to be lots of guys in her life). Secondly, she's quite a flirty girl and if she wants something/someone she usually goes for it. She's also quite a cocktease- sometimes she can say quite dirty things and flirt, but then play hard to get. Seeing that she hasn't really done anything to indicate she likes me other than a friend I dont think think shes interested.

Basically I'm crazy about her to the point where its just driving me mad thinking about her all the time. It doesnt help when I see her either, she's usually quite flirty and people often mistake us for a couple.

So i dont know what to do. If i tell her how i feel it'll make things awkward for me, but not her as apparently her guy mates often end up telling her they are in love with her. Personally I wouldn't be able to talk to her in the same way as before if i told her that.

My other option (this seems best) is to sever all ties with her. I'm thinking that when we next go out of telling her how i feel and that I wont be seeing her again. This seems kinda harsh but if i know that im never going to see her again then maybe I can get over her.

I've tried just living with it but after 2 years I still feel the same way, each time i see her she doesn't seem to go out of my head for days.

So any advice on what to do? Any help appreciated.

[*candycane2*]

Hiya :)

well i'll start with sayin " thats some hell of a dilema".

Well, i think you should tell her, if its driving you mad inside then just tell her, she might be ok and expect the fact, but you said loadz of guy mates tell her this, so she might not bother if you told her, she might be flattered. Yes it will be akward for you, but its better out than in is it not!
If she reacts badly to you having feelings then thats a risk your gonna have to take, it will show you her true colours.

You never know she might feel the same!

Dont know if that is any good to you though!

love kandy x

[WildSpirit]

Originally posted by spoonboy

So i dont know what to do. If i tell her how i feel it'll make things awkward for me, but not her as apparently her guy mates often end up telling her they are in love with her. Personally I wouldn't be able to talk to her in the same way as before if i told her that.



I really liked my good friend and i thought that i would have problems talking to him after telling him but i told him anyway. I found that it didnt change the way that i talked to him and it made us better friends in the process as he knew i would be honest and open with him and it made me feel good about the fact that i could tell him how i feel and talk to him about anything. So even if she doesnt want to go out with you, doesnt mean that you have to severe all ties as you may be losing a valuable friend. Give it a go, you may find out that things will turn out alright and even strengthen the friendship you have. At least you will never regret the fact you never tried.

Hope that helped, and good luck with whatever you choose;)

[Mr_Wobble]

Well, I reckon you should drop the dramatic "never seeing her again" part, and at least tell her how you feel. Let her know exactly how you feel about her, and how hard it is for you not to be with her, and how you miss her, and how much it does drive you crazy.

[Susie]

TheSite article on unrequited love (http://www.thesite.org/youthnet/jsp/polopoly.jsp?d=419&a=2564)

May help...

Susie :)