Closeness

[WLH]

Does anybody find that they want mates but don't want to be tight-knit about it? I just have this thing about closeness. I like talking to people and going to the pub with people and stuff, but I just have this thing about being close to them. It's almost like I get this sense of freedom from not being in a tight-knit group. At the same time I don't like isolation. I just don't want close mates. I just can't seem to decide what I want out of life :confused:

[ShyBoy]

i want the close mates - ive got a bunch atm actually, but cos of 1 of em im going to make new friends now

[perfect***day]

I know what you mean Will, sometimes you just want the freedom of having a laugh with some mates but can't be bothered with close relationships. I've felt like that before.

However, close friends really are important - who are you going to turn to when the going gets tough? If you feel trapped by your friendship group then by all means meet new people, but don't be irresponsible and forget your true friends because you 'don't want closeness', because you'll thank your lucky stars you have them if you ever need a shoulder to cry on.

[Fairy]

I know exactly how you feel. Sometimes i feel too close to certain individuals and it is making me realise that i need to be alone sometimes and have my space. Think i need to re-think about who i can trust too and try and move on a bit.

[WLH]

Originally posted by perfect***day
I know what you mean Will, sometimes you just want the freedom of having a laugh with some mates but can't be bothered with close relationships. I've felt like that before.

However, close friends really are important - who are you going to turn to when the going gets tough? If you feel trapped by your friendship group then by all means meet new people, but don't be irresponsible and forget your true friends because you 'don't want closeness', because you'll thank your lucky stars you have them if you ever need a shoulder to cry on.

I understand all that - but I'm not really the type who needs a shoulder to cry on, and I suppose that's more or less my point. Thing is, I don't know who my true friends are - don't know whether people really like me or whether they're waiting for me to slip up. I also don't like being possessive - if someone wanted to stay away from me or I got dumped or something I don't think I'd cry about it all - I'd just kind of think 'These things happen, it doesn't matter'. Maybe that sounds stoic and dismissive. I don't know?